terri < Jesus

what is my purpose here on this earth? well maybe i need to clarify some things first before i delve into the true answer to that question. 

i became a believer in and follower of Jesus when i was 18 years old in the parking lot of the First Baptist Church of Toms River.  i am not going to go into the details of what led up to that at this time, however, i am grateful i gave my life to Christ. that is not to say that over the years i have not "taken back control" of it. if you read my other posts, you will see i have gone down paths not meant for me to travel.

this year i am learning more about the God who loved me enough to save my soul. lately my readings have been showing me that these "detours" have not changed His ultimate plan for my life. there are repercussions that i must live with as a result, but God and His plans can never be upended by anyone or anything. nothing surprises Him. He knew everything about me, before there ever was a me. everything. and still, He created me and allows me to continue to walk this earth. 

i admit, it is hard for me on most days to even begin to understand or comprehend the "why" He created me. He knew all the ways i would mess up my life and many times the lives of those around me. i must remember that my thoughts are not His thoughts, my ways are not His ways. nor do i have to. that is where trusting Him completely comes in. surrendering my life in submission to Him.

i am going to say it again~submission! did that make you cringe or bristle the hairs on your neck? whether society admits it or not, everyone lives in submission to something or someone. fashion, alcohol, sex, political figures, pornography, drugs, money, fame, work, ego-whatever sits in the center of your life, your heart, drives what you serve and what you are submitting yourself to. 

every day, all day, what we do, how we speak, will show what we are submissive to, what directs our lives. these things that drive us can destroy from either the inside out or the outside in. like most people there are many things i must do each day; go to work, eat, speak to other humans, you get the idea. this will reveal who or what my life is controlled by, what i am submissive to. this is where the answer to the question, "what is my purpose here on earth" is found.

i was created to be a light, a beacon, a living, walking, breathing testimony of God Almighty and the love He has for mankind. it's a huge purpose and calling. in my own power, i can't even begin to fulfill it, however, because He sits in the center of my life, and i have submitted to Him, i can fulfill my ultimate purpose on this earth. 

He has taken and will continue to take all of my shortcomings, my flaws, my failures, my mistakes, my disobedience, my desire to live for and serve Him, and use it all to His glory if i turn it all over to His control. john the baptist summed it up pretty well~"he must increase, but i must decrease'" (john 3:30) and this is true of me today....for me to be a light, a beacon, a living, walking, breathing testimony, to shine hope, encouragement, peace and a love that surpasses any this world can offer, then terri must decrease so Jesus can increase in me.

this world wants me to be "me", but my Lord wants me to be all of me in Him. in Him is the true freedom i have always wanted. if you don't have a clue as what i am talking about, if it makes no sense to you, then i urge you to pick up a bible and start to read it. start in the book of john. then keep going. i pray that your eyes, heart and mind will see truth. not the world's truth, but the truth that will set your life free.

terri is less, but in Jesus she is all of terri she needs to be. truly less is more....

the book of john, john 3:16, proverbs, psalms, matthew, mark, luke

across the table.....

who is your favorite person to sit across the table from? i would guess it is someone you love. i have such great memories of many family gatherings with a room full of my most loved people, loud, full of life and laughter, food and fellowship, sharing our lives together for a few hours. i will always treasure these times and look forward to many more.

have you ever thought about what it would be like to sit across the table from Jesus? what would He look like? what would He talk to me about? could I even face Him knowing all the times i have let Him down with my sinful self? chose things above Him? was too "busy" to even acknowledge Him? when I didn't trust Him for all things in my life?

He wants to share a table with me in spite of all those things i think push Him away. He longs for me to sit with Him and just be still. to feel the acceptance He has for me. to remind me He loves me, sees me as His, covered in His amazing mercy and grace by the price He paid for my sin. He is always waiting for me to come and sit with Him~

i imagine seeing His scarred hands, outstretched to me to take them. His eyes shine, full of glory, honor and holiness. His smile warm and loving, the kind that draws you in and wraps around your heart in full acceptance, peace and contentment. His mannerism is graceful, royal. when He speaks His voice is gentle and yet carries the authority and power of all Heaven. He is clothed in white, simple but full of glory and honor. 

tables are a place i find comforting. i have always sat at them to write, read His Word, journal, just sit. in my "create room" i have a table where i do my bible study time with a cup of coffee. He stands at the door waiting for me to ask Him to sit with me. how many times have i just walked past Him, sat down and got "busy"? He never tires of waiting for me to be still with Him. to bask in His presence, love and peace. 

my table needs to be a place i sit with my Jesus. a safe place to find sanctuary from the busyness, pain, drama, politics, battles of this world. a time to be still and be renewed by His presence. to fellowship with Him. to be reminded of how much He loves me. and how much i love Him. 

i hope you love Him too, and know Him and the price He paid for you. if not, He is waiting for you to come to His table and know Him. 

john 14:6; luke 22:27; luke 11:37; matthew 9:10; psalm 23:5-6; john 3:16

wwjd.....

those letters became very popular some time ago. it started out to be a reminder to those of us who follow Jesus to think about what He would do in any given situation. it's momentum was infectious with wristbands, t shirts, hats etc. all worn proudly. but did it really remind us to think: what would Jesus do when faced with a decision on how to act or what to do in a situation?  lately, these letters have caused me to really think about my actions in light of my relationship with Jesus.

in my bible studies of late, i have been reading how Jesus handled life while He walked this earth, and how i am to handle life as a follower of Him. how I conduct my actions, my testimony and any ministry i am called to do. the theme that continues to jump out at me is: love. everything Jesus did was out of His great love and obedience to the Father and His amazing grace, mercy and love for us.

as a believer and follower of Him, i am called to conduct my life as He did with the help of the Holy Spirit. as i began to look at Him in scripture and in how He related to people i see the following:

He never, ever, ever minimized the truth about Himself, His purpose, His standing with the Father, His humanness, His position on sin and the consequences of sin unpaid for. He always spoke the truth. always.

He dined and associated with the worst of society in that time; tax collectors, prostitutes, adulterers, demon possessed, poor, Samaritans, disease ridden and the common man. i imagined what it would be like to sit at a table with Jesus, share a meal and conversation. (another post!) i think what is amazing is that people were drawn to Him. even though He called out the sin in their life and the need for repentance. why? because He did it in His great love for them, and they felt it.  

i often forget that as much a Jesus is wholly God, He was also wholly a man. that is why He understands us so much and is the perfect One to intercede to the Father on our behalf.  He loved His disciples, parents, friends.  He cried at the tomb of Lazarus. He was angry in the temple with the money changers yet did not sin in His anger.  i cannot say the same. 

i definitely do not love in the capacity that Jesus does. i fail so many times. but every day i ask Him to give me His heart, His eyes, to love what He loves. i want to bring Him to the homeless, the lost and hurting, the sick, the fallen and i want to do it as He did. i will always speak the truth. i cannot nor will not deny that sin needs payment. i pray that i can share His truth in His way, in love, grace and mercy.

"amazing grace, how sweet the sound, that saved a wretch like me. i once was lost but now am found, was blind but now i see." He keeps showing me, teaching me, guiding me and molding me to be His witness here. 1Corinthians 13 has been on my heart a LOT lately.  in one of my devotions the author said she puts her name every day in verses 4-7 and her goal was to put on all the qualities of love. love is patient=terri is patient, well i fail right there. love does not envy or boast=terri does not envy or boast. you get the idea. it is a good place to start to be the witness Jesus was and wants me to be.

Jesus is the truth, the way and the life. He is because of love. am i acting, speaking, walking in love? so i find myself more and more asking wwjd.........

1cor 13; ephesians 2:4-10, 5:1; colossians 3:12-17; hebrews 4:15-16;,1john 2:3-6, 4:7-2; romans 8